


Roses and Dresses

by Kereng



Category: The West Wing
Genre: F/M, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-04-16
Updated: 2003-04-16
Packaged: 2019-05-30 10:14:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15094607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kereng/pseuds/Kereng
Summary: A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of theWest Wing Fanfiction Central, a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in theannouncement post.





	1. Roses and Dresses

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

**Roses and Dresses**

**by:** Kerry

**Character(s):** Josh, Donna  
**Pairing(s):** Josh/Donna  
**Category(s):** Humor, Romance   
**Rating:** TEEN  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own `em.  
**Summary:** 8th in the Banter and Bets series  
**Author's Note:** This is the sequel to `"Bellowed Out", "Husky", "Cracked", "Revealed", "Revenge", "Fool's Game" and "Notice" and you need to read them for this to make sense.  Many, many thanks for all the feedback for that fic; it's greatly appreciated. I should probably point out that the time-setting for this is Season 4, while Sam is on his leave of absence.

"So, Donna, it's been three weeks since you and Josh made your *official* engagement announcement, have you set a wedding date yet?" CJ asked as they ate yogurts in their favorite café. 

"No, not yet...well, not really anyway."  At CJ's confused look, Donna smiled and explained further.  "We're gonna wait until Congress is out of session for the summer, so that we can get some time off for a honeymoon.  We haven't set an actual date though, it'll just be sometime around then." 

"Josh is actually agreeing to take time off for a honeymoon?" CJ queried with a skeptical laugh. 

Donna smirked as she replied, "I have my ways of persuading him." 

"I bet you do," CJ laughed. 

* 

"Hey, Josh." 

"Hey, CJ, what can I do for you?" he asked, removing his feet from his desk and giving her his full attention. 

"Nothing really, I just wanted to congratulate you on putting Donna first and agreeing to take time off for a honeymoon," she replied, closing the office door as she spoke. 

"You didn't think I'd put Donna first?" he queried, with a little hurt in his tone. 

"Of course I did, Josh, I know you always put Donna first.  I'm just surprised you're taking actual time off, you know, other than just a long weekend or something." 

"Well, I figure I'll get a reward for being a good husband," he grinned. 

"Typical," she replied, rolling her eyes at him.  "So, have you decided what *kind* of a wedding you're gonna have?" 

"Huh?" 

"You know, small, large, where, that kind of stuff?" 

"Uh, CJ, didn't you just have lunch with Donna?" 

"Yeah." 

"So, why didn't you ask *her* all this instead of me?" 

"I did, and now I'm asking you." 

"What, don't you think we'll agree or something?" he chuckled. 

"No, it's just...Josh, Donna said that you want a small wedding, a small private ceremony." 

"Yeah, so?" 

"Well, have you talked to the President lately?" 

"I talk to the President every day, CJ; it's kinda my job." 

"Josh, don't be a smart-ass.  I mean it, have you talked to him about your wedding?" 

"No, and you know why?  `Cos I'm not marrying the *President*, I'm marrying Donna; this is between us.  Why do I need to talk to the President?" 

"Well, you are gonna invite him, aren't you?" 

"Yeah, of course we are." 

"Well then, you need to consider the fact that wherever he goes, there's a Secret Service entourage and security issues to consider." 

"I know all that, CJ.  Is there gonna be a point anytime soon?" 

"He's had a few ideas about your wedding...you should talk to him." 

"The President has had ideas about *my* wedding?  And he's talked to *you* about them?" Josh exclaimed in amazement. 

"Yeah, and you should talk to him, Josh." 

"I don't think I will, but you know, thanks all the same." 

"Josh, he's your boss, and he's the *President*." 

"Yeah, and that's why it took so long for anything to happen between Donna and I, CJ.  Look, he has no input to my wedding, other than as a guest, the same as everyone else.  Yes, there are security issues to be considered, and they will be considered when we decide on a venue.  Yes, there is his schedule to consider, and it will be considered when we decide on a date.  But, I am not going to have *anyone* dictate how, when and where Donna and I should get married; it's *our* decision.  You got that, CJ?" he asked angrily. 

"You finished your little rant there, Josh?" she asked with raised eyebrows, staring him down. 

"Uh, yeah," he replied, swallowing hard.  "Sorry, it's just...this has to be between Donna and I." 

"You still have to talk to the President, Josh.  *And*, whatever he says, you have to talk it over with Donna; like you said, she has input into this decision, she might like his ideas." 

"You obviously know what his ideas are, why don't you just tell me?" 

"And ruin it for the President?  I don't think so.  Listen, he has some time free tonight, go see him." 

"Yeah," Josh agreed reluctantly, watching CJ give him an encouraging smile as she left his office. 

* 

"Hey," Josh smiled tiredly, returning from his meeting with the President to find Donna sitting behind his desk with her coat on, waiting for him. 

"Hi.  You ready to go, or do we need to work on something else?" 

"No, let's go.  I...I do need to talk to you though." 

"Is something wrong?" she asked, searching his face and frowning at the worry lines she found there. 

"Yeah, no, I...let's go home, we'll talk there." 

"Josh?" Donna quizzed worriedly.  "Has something happened?  Did the President say something?" 

"No," he sighed.  "Well, yeah but, we shouldn't talk about it here.  It's not work related, so let's go home."  He had donned his coat and grabbed his backpack and held out a hand to pull Donna from the chair. 

"Josh, you're worrying me.  What's going on?  What did the President need to see you about that's not work related?" 

"Us," he replied honestly, locking his eyes with hers.  He picked up her bag from the floor and passed it to her before taking her hand again to lead her from the office.  "He has a few ideas about the wedding that we need to talk about." 

"Like what?" she queried, dropping his hand and not walking any further. 

"Please, Donna," he begged.  "It's late, let's go home and we'll talk there, I promise." 

She nodded silently and slipped a hand through his offered arm, letting him lead her from the building. 

* 

"So, what are the President's ideas then?" Donna asked as soon as they entered their apartment and had hung up their coats. 

"Donna," Josh whined.  "We've only just got home, can't we wait a few minutes?" 

"No, Josh.  You wouldn't tell me in the car, you said we should wait until we got home.  Well, we're now home, so let's talk.  What did the President say?  You seem worried about it, does he want us to call it off?" she asked nervously. 

"No," Josh smiled, stepping towards her and wrapping his arms around her waist.  "Of course he doesn't want us to call it off."  He dropped a kiss on her temple and then released her.  "Let's sit down, okay?" he said, motioning towards the couch. 

Donna sat on the couch and Josh took a seat on the coffee table, facing her and taking her hands in his. 

"He asked me what ideas we'd had about the wedding, what kind of ceremony, etc.  I told him that we were thinking of asking Judge Mendoza to marry us, in a small private ceremony, with just our family and close friends there, including the President and First Lady, of course." 

"And?" Donna prompted when he hesitated. 

"And," he sighed, "he said that it all sounded nice but he would suggest a few changes." 

"Changes?  Like what?" 

Josh closed his eyes and rubbed his thumbs over the back of Donna's hands as he answered her question.  "Well, the gist of it is that he thinks we should change *everything*, except...he's gonna let us keep Mendoza." 

"What?  Josh, I don't understand." 

He dropped her hands and brought his hands up to cup her face.  Looking deep into her eyes and letting out a long sigh, he said, "He wants us to get married in the Rose Garden, make it a big event.  I'm sorry, Donna, I know we agreed to keep it small." 

"You told him we'd do it?" she quizzed, leaning back against the couch so that his hands were no longer on her face.  "I can't...you agreed to this without even talking to *me*?" 

"No!  Donna, I...I told him I'd have to talk to you about it, of course I did," he replied, shifting his position so that he was perched on the very edge of the coffee table.  Taking her hands again and locking his gaze with her, he continued, "But, I don't see how we can argue.  Believe me, I wanted to, and I was going to, but I was *this close*," he said, releasing one of her hands so he could bring his thumb and index finger very close together, "to exploding in the Oval Office, and I didn't think that would go down very well."  He sighed again, showing his frustration.  "It's what he wants, Donna.  He's the *President*, we serve at his pleasure." 

"I know that, Josh.  But, our marriage isn't anything to do with the Bartlet Administration.  We talked about this, you told me it wouldn't be a problem, that everyone would respect our wishes."  Josh closed his eyes again; the hurt in Donna's tone cutting into his heart as he realized that she felt he'd let her down. 

"I'm sorry, I really am.  Look, I'm gonna talk to Leo tomorrow, see if he can help us out." 

"Yeah?"  She looked at him hopefully and he gave her a weak smile. 

"Yeah.  Hey, whatever happens, we're still gonna get married.  If it has to be with all the fanfare, then so be it; I just want to be married to you, Donna." 

"I know," she said gently, leaning forward and capturing his lips. 

"I won't even know anyone else is at the ceremony," he said against her lips.  "I'll only see you." 

"Josh," she sighed contentedly, kissing him deeply.  "You say the sweetest things sometimes." 

* 

"Donna, are you okay?" 

Donna looked up from her desk to find CJ watching her intently.  "Oh, hey, CJ.  Yeah, I'm fine." 

"Are you sure?  You and Josh have seemed a little...off the last couple of days.  Is something wrong?" 

"No," she smiled.  "We're fine." 

"You sure?"  Donna nodded.  "Okay, but you know I'm here if you need anything, right?" 

"Yeah, I know.  Thanks." 

* 

"CJ?" Donna said, entering her friend's office late that evening. 

"Hi, Donna," she smiled. 

"You were right."  CJ gave her a blank look.  "This morning, when you thought something was wrong with Josh and I, you were right." 

"Oh, God.  What did he do?" 

Donna couldn't help laughing.  "He didn't do anything, CJ; this isn't Josh's fault." 

"Really?" she queried skeptically. 

"Yeah," Donna smiled.  "There's nothing he could have done about this." 

"So, what's wrong?" CJ inquired, motioning for Donna to take a seat. 

"The President wants us to have a big wedding, in the Rose Garden." 

"And you don't want that?" she asked, her brow furrowed. 

"Not really, no.  Like I told you before, we planned to have a small wedding, just close friends and family." 

"Yeah, but Donna, didn't you always dream of having a big wedding?  I mean, most people would jump at the chance to get married in the Rose Garden of the White House.  It's every little girl's dream, isn't it?" 

"Yeah, I used to dream of a big wedding when I was a little girl," Donna admitted.  "But now," she continued, clasping her hands together, "I just want something quiet.  As long as Josh is there, that's all that matters." 

"Are you sure, Donna?  You're not just saying that because it's what Josh wants?" 

"No," she sighed.  "It's what we *both* want...wanted.  But now..." 

"The President wants a big wedding for you." 

"Yeah," she said sadly. 

"Have you told the President this?" 

"Josh told him what we were planning, but you've talked to the President about this, you know he has his heart set on a Rose Garden wedding, with numerous politicians there.  Josh tried to talk to Leo about it, even pointed out that it's probably not ethical to have our wedding here, but Leo didn't want to start an argument with the President.  We can't go against his wishes, CJ.  We just have to accept it and try to figure out a way to plan a huge wedding in only a few months." 

"The planning part won't be a problem," CJ replied; Donna looked at her inquisitively.  "You have plenty of people around to help you, me for one." 

"Thanks, CJ.  Listen, I should go, let you get back to work.  Thanks for listening to me." 

"I'm sorry, Donna," CJ said sincerely. 

"It's okay.  It's not like any of this is your fault." 

* 

"Josh, have a seat," the President said, indicating the chair opposite where he was sitting in the Oval Office. 

"You wanted to see me, Sir?" 

"Yes, I believe you and Donna are not very happy about the idea of a big wedding." 

"Who told you that, Sir?" Josh asked with surprise. 

"CJ came to see me.  She said that she was talking to Donna about it, and that neither of you are very happy with the situation." 

"I'm sorry, Sir.  I didn't expect Donna to say anything..." 

"Josh, it's alright.  I just want to know why you didn't tell me." 

"You seemed to have your heart set on a big, Rose Garden wedding, Sir." 

"And I'm that much of an ogre that you couldn't have just told me that you and Donna really didn't want that?" 

"Well, I did *try* to tell you, Sir.  I mean, I told you we were just planning a quiet wedding." 

The President looked at him seriously for a moment, holding his gaze.  "Josh, I have something to tell you, and I don't want you to get mad at me." 

"I can't exactly *get* mad at you, Sir; I could be fired for that." 

"True, Josh, very true," he smiled.  "Okay," he started, and then paused and let out a breath.  "I never really wanted you and Donna to have a big wedding."  Josh's eyes grew wide.  "You two deserve every privacy, your relationship has already been played out in front of the Press, you certainly don't need more intrusion on your wedding day." 

"Sir?"  Josh looked totally confused and the President smiled at him. 

"It was a prank, Josh," he admitted. 

"What?!" 

"I knew you wanted a quiet wedding, so I decided to say that I'd like a big event, just to wind you up.  I never expected it to hurt you and Donna or I'd never have done it.  I'm sorry, son." 

"Why would you do that?" Josh demanded. 

"I just wanted to have a little fun; I've been kinda left out of all the pranks lately, after the Vegas thing and the thing with Sam's assistant.  CJ asked if I wanted in on this and I jumped at the chance." 

"CJ?!" 

"Ah, uh," the President stammered, realizing belatedly that he'd just revealed CJ's involvement in the prank. 

"Sir, what part did CJ play in all this?" 

The President knew that Josh would persist with his questioning until he got the answers he wanted, so he decided to fill him in quickly. 

"She came up with the idea to say that I wanted you to have a big wedding.  She had originally been going to say that it would make for good press, etc. but she didn't think she'd be able to get you convinced that way; that's why she came to me." 

"I'm going to kill her," Josh vowed. 

"Now, Josh, you're not going to do that." 

"Oh, I am," Josh insisted. 

"Are you sure you want to do that just yet?" 

"I'm sorry?" 

"Think about it, Josh.  Do you want to `tip your hand' so soon?" 

"You mean..." 

"Yes, I'm sure you'll come up with something, and I'm more than happy to help out." 

"Thank you, Sir," Josh grinned.  "Just to clarify, I can tell Donna that we can have a small wedding?" 

"Yes, you can.  I'm looking forward to receiving my invitation." 

Josh stood and walked towards the door to the outer office.  Stopping as his fingers touched the door handle, he turned around and looked back at the President.  "Well, you know, Sir, after the stunt you just pulled on us, I wouldn't be so sure that you'll be *getting* an invitation," he smirked.  The President let out a hearty laugh as Josh left the office. 

* 

"Sam, it's good to see you," Donna said, giving Sam a brief hug when she and Josh joined him in the restaurant. 

"You too, Donna.  I can't believe I'm in D.C. yet hardly get to see you guys." 

"That's because you're too busy being a pain in our asses," Josh mock-  
complained. 

"Hey!" 

"Josh, play nice with Congressman Seaborn," Donna warned, waving her hand to beckon CJ and Toby over as they entered the restaurant. 

"Hi, CJ," Sam greeted, giving CJ a kiss on the cheek.  "Toby."  The two men shook hands before sitting down. 

"So, Josh, you called us all here, and I assume you're paying, so, to what do we owe the honor?" CJ inquired with a grin. 

"Okay, well firstly, I never said I was paying, so get that out of your head right now." 

"Damn, and I was gonna order the lobster," CJ sassed. 

"You're not paying?" Toby tried to clarify. 

"No, I'm not," Josh confirmed. 

Toby looked to CJ and then to Sam.  "Let's go," he said, starting to rise from his seat. 

"Whoa there, Tobus," Josh smirked.  "Just `cos I'm not paying, doesn't mean you guys have to."  They all looked at him blankly and then Donna got his meaning. 

"Joshua!" she admonished. 

"What?" he defended, raising his hands to stop Donna from hitting him.  "You were the one who didn't want to do this in the office." 

"And you were the one who refused to have them all over to our apartment," Donna stated, raising her eyebrows at him in challenge. 

"You didn't want us in your apartment?"  Sam sounded hurt. 

"No, but there's a reason," Josh said lamely.  CJ, Sam and even Toby looked at him pointedly, awaiting an explanation.  "Last time you guys came over you made a real mess of the place; there were beer bottles and pizza boxes everywhere, not to mention the bits of cheese that Sam managed to amazingly miss his mouth with."  They stared at him in disbelief and he added weakly, "Donna made me clean the place up, since I ordered the pizza." 

"No, Josh," Donna interjected.  "I made you clean the mess up because *you* caused most of it, as a result of going over your two beer limit when you hadn't eaten all day." 

"This is all very interesting," Toby said dryly, "but can we get back to the topic of who is paying for this meal?" 

"Donna," Josh grinned. 

"That's okay, I don't mind," Donna smiled. 

"You don't?" Josh asked with surprise. 

"No, I don't," she confirmed sweetly. 

"You're gonna charge it to my credit card, aren't you?" 

"Bet your ass I am," she grinned. 

"Okay, well, now that that's settled, care to fill us in on why we're here?" Sam asked.  "I mean, other than to enjoy each other's company," he added hastily, noticing CJ's glare in his direction. 

"Let's order, then we'll talk," Josh suggested. 

* 

As their empty entrée plates were cleared away Josh became serious, interrupting the jovial banter between CJ and Sam. 

"You wanna know why we've called you here then?" he asked. 

"God, Josh, you make it sound like an Agatha Christie novel," Donna complained. 

"What?" he laughed, furrowing his brow at her. 

"You know, the bit at the end where Hercule Poirot always brings all the suspects together to reveal the murderer." 

"Ah kay," Josh smiled.  "Your way of thinking never ceases to amaze me, Donnatella."  They locked their gazes and smiled intensely at each other. 

"Hey, guys, you know we're still here, right?" Sam interrupted. 

"Sorry," Josh smirked.  "Where was I?" 

"You were gonna tell us why you invited us to dinner," CJ answered. 

"Right, yeah."  He stopped talking again and took Donna's hand, bringing their joined hands up and placing them on the table.  "Well, as you know, Donna and I are getting married."  They all nodded.  "And, as you also know, the President wants us to have a big wedding, which Donna and I are not happy about."  CJ dipped her head, but both Josh and Donna noticed her guilty look and they shared a small smile.  "Anyway," Josh continued, "I had a chat with the President last night; somehow he'd found out that Donna and I weren't happy with his idea."  He looked pointedly at CJ as he spoke and saw the slight blush in her cheeks.  "It's okay, CJ, we're glad you talked to him," he smiled.  "He said that he never wanted to make Donna and I unhappy, he just wanted us to have the perfect setting for our wedding, and he thought the Rose Garden would be good."  He noticed Toby beginning to shift impatiently and he let out a long breath.  "To cut a long story short, the President has offered Donna and I the use of his farm in Manchester; we're going to have the ceremony and reception in the grounds." 

"In *Manchester*?" CJ gasped. 

"Yeah," Josh confirmed.  "He said that he talked to the First Lady before he talked to me and they both agreed; they want to do this for Donna and I as a wedding present." 

"I assumed you'd be getting married in D.C.," Sam said, voicing the thoughts of his two companions. 

"So did we, Sam, but Congress will be out of session and things should be quiet, so there's no real need for us to be here.  Manchester is pretty handy actually, as it'll be easier to travel to for Donna's family in Wisconsin and my family in Connecticut; my mom will come to D.C. first and then fly up with us on Air Force One." 

"You seem to have it all figured out," CJ said, obviously pleased that the President hadn't revealed he had been playing a prank about the `big wedding'.  "You've set a date then?" 

"No," Donna smiled.  "Not yet.  We're still trying to find something suitable.  Apparently, a lot hinges on our honeymoon plans." 

"Really?  And what *are* your plans?" CJ inquired with a grin. 

"Like we're gonna tell you, CJ," Josh laughed. 

CJ caught Donna's eyes and mouthed the words "we're gonna talk later" to her, prompting Donna to smile and chuckle slightly. 

"Anyway, none of that is really why we asked you all here," Josh said.  They looked at him inquisitively and he instinctively grasped Donna's hand a little tighter.  "We wanted to ask you all something, it is wedding-related though." 

Josh paused and let Donna pick up the conversation.  "CJ," she said, smiling at her friend, "I was wondering if you'd do me," she stopped as Josh tugged her hand, "sorry, *us*, the great honor of being one of our bridesmaids.  Would you?" 

"Of course I will!" CJ exclaimed, jumping from her seat and moving to envelop Donna in a hug.  Josh let go of Donna's hand so that she could stand up and then he stood himself to kiss CJ's cheek. 

"Thanks, CJ," Donna and Josh said in unison as they all sat down again. 

"Does this mean we get to go dress shopping?" CJ asked eagerly.  Josh earned an elbow in the ribs when Donna saw him roll his eyes. 

"Kind of," Donna replied cryptically. "My sister is going to be the other bridesmaid, and I kinda promised my mom that she could choose the bridesmaids dresses, since she won't be here to help me choose mine," she explained.  "I hope you don't mind, CJ." 

"Of course I don't mind, Donna, I totally understand.  I can help you choose *your* dress though, right?" 

"Oh yeah.  And we will have to go shoe shopping." 

"Oh, God," Josh groaned.  "I'm gonna have to hear about all the shoes you tried on and then get the added bonus of having to pay for the damn things, aren't I?" 

"Well, we could always just call the whole thing off, Joshua," Donna pouted. 

"Sorry," he mumbled apologetically. 

"Josh, it's your turn," Donna prompted. 

"Oh, yeah."  He smiled and turned his attention to Sam and Toby.  "Guys, we've been through a lot together," Josh said seriously, "and I would really like you both there with me when I do the most important thing I will ever do in my life, that's marrying Donna, by the way," he grinned, as Donna let out a long-suffering sigh.  "Sam, would you do *us*," he said pointedly, smirking at Donna, "the great honor of being my best man?  And Toby, I'd really like you there as a groomsman, right up there with Sam and I.  It's not going to be a Jewish ceremony, but having you with me will make it seem more like one."  He left his statements hanging there and watched the myriad of emotions crossing Sam and Toby's faces. 

"Josh, I'd be honored," Sam beamed, stretching out a hand to his friend. 

"Toby?" 

"I'm doing this for Donna, you understand," he stated as he shook Josh's hand. 

"Of course," Josh grinned. 

"There's just one thing I want to say," Donna interjected.  "Toby, you're in charge of the bachelor party." 

"Hey, that's the best man's job," Sam complained. 

"Yeah, but we all know your track record, Sam; I don't want Josh ending up sleeping with a prostitute," she grinned. 

"She was a call girl," Sam muttered.  "And anyway," he continued, raising his voice to a normal level again, "I didn't meet her at a bachelor party, so that has nothing to do with this."  There was no anger in his tone, so Donna felt safe to retort. 

"No, but if you could *accidentally* sleep with a call girl, who knows what you'd end up actually *planning* for Josh," she grinned. 

Sam opened his mouth to object but just gave a self-deprecating smile and a shrug of his shoulders.  "Okay, Toby, we're co-planners," he said.  Toby said nothing. 


	2. Roses and Dresses 2

**Roses and Dresses**

**by:** Kerry

**Character(s):** Josh, Donna  
**Pairing(s):** Josh/Donna  
**Category(s):** Humor, Romance   
**Rating:** TEEN  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own `em.  
**Summary:** 8th in the Banter and Bets series  
**Author's Note:** This is the sequel to "Bellowed Out", "Husky", "Cracked", "Revealed", "Revenge", "Fool's Game" and "Notice" and you need to read them for this to make sense.  Many, many thanks for all the feedback for that fic; it's greatly appreciated. I should probably point out that the time-setting for this is Season 4, while Sam is on his leave of absence.

* * *

"CJ, this came in the mail for you," Carol said as she dropped an A4-  
size envelope on CJ's desk. 

"Is it urgent?" a harried CJ asked. 

"Well, that depends on your point of view," Carol answered cryptically. 

"Carol." 

"Okay," Carol laughed.  "It's from Donna's mom." 

That caught CJ's attention and she grabbed the envelope, pulling out its contents as she asked, "The dress?"  Carol nodded.  "Have you looked at it?" 

"Uh...um..." 

"Carol?" 

"You should see for yourself, CJ," Carol suggested, surreptitiously closing the office door and then taking a seat in a visitor's chair, carefully watching CJ's reaction as she flipped through the dress catalogue. 

"Which page is it on?" CJ asked as she turned over numerous pages. 

Carol leaned forward in her chair.  "Oh, I think you've already passed it." 

"I can't have," CJ stated.  "None of those were..."  She stopped and looked up at Carol.  "No!" 

Carol gave her a pitying smile and turned back a few pages until she found the one where the dress was marked.  "That's it," she said, pointing at the picture. 

"You've got to be kidding me!" CJ exclaimed.  "Is this some kind of joke?  Are you trying to mess with me?" she accused, picking up the empty envelope and looking at it's postmark. 

"No, I'm not and, to be honest, I would agree that it was a joke if the catalogue had come from Donna, but it came from her mom, sent directly to you." 

"But it's...it's..." CJ spluttered. 

"I know," Carol said sympathetically. 

"Have we gone back in time to the `80's?  You know, to when these...  
*things* were in fashion?"  CJ had dropped the catalogue like it was a hot iron and was covering her face with her hands, peering through her parted fingers at the offending picture, somehow hoping it would look better that way. 

"What are you going to do?" 

"I don't know," CJ practically whimpered. 

"Donna's mom does know what you look like, right?" 

"Yeah," she replied sadly.  "I've even met her once." 

"So she knows that..." 

"That I won't look good in a dress that is designed to imitate a pink marshmallow?  I would have thought so, yeah," she answered glumly. 

"Maybe you should talk to Donna?" Carol suggested. 

"And tell her what, `Donna, I'm sorry but your mom needs her head examined'?" 

"Well, no," Carol smiled.  "I wouldn't recommend putting it quite like that." 

CJ threw her head back and clasped her hands together, stretching them out in front of her to try and relieve some of her tension. 

Letting out a large sigh and leaning forward on her desk once more, she said, "I can't talk to Donna; she already feels guilty that her mom can't be here to be involved in choosing the bridal gown, if I tell her that I hate her mom's choice for the bridesmaids dresses, she'll be devastated.  I can't do that to her." 

"So, what are you going to do?" 

"I have no idea." 

"Surely Donna will realize herself, once she sees her mom's choice?" 

"Yeah, maybe," CJ said with a hint of hopefulness in her tone.  "But, even if she does hate the dress choice, she's not going to want to tell her mom that, is she?" 

"CJ, it's *her* wedding." 

"Yeah, but I can't see her being prepared to hurt her mom's feelings even more, and I wouldn't blame her." 

"Hey, maybe this is her mom's way of ensuring that no-one shows up the bride, you know, so that no-one will look better than Donna?" 

"Carol," CJ said incredulously, "do you really think *anyone* is going to look better than Donna, even if the bridesmaids were wearing decent dresses?" 

"No, I guess not," Carol admitted with a laugh. 

"Oh, God," she groaned.  "Listen, Carol, do me a favor?" 

"No, I'm not going to tell Donna you hate her mom's dress choice." 

"That's not what I was going to ask," CJ said with a glare. 

"It's not?" 

"No."  She paused for a moment and Carol looked at her inquisitively.  "Okay, here's what we're going to do -" 

"*We*?" 

"Yes, *we*; you are now involved in this Carol, unless you can guarantee that you won't laugh at me if I'm forced to wear that dress to the wedding." 

"Uh...okay, what are we going to do?" 

"Deny all knowledge." 

"Huh?" 

"You're going to take this away," CJ explained, putting the dress catalogue back in its envelope, "and, if Donna asks, you'll tell her that it hasn't arrived yet." 

"You want me to lie?" Carol questioned, her eyes wide and her mouth turned up in a smile. 

"No, I...I just don't want you to tell the truth, that's all." 

"CJ, you've been working with politicians for too long," Carol laughed. 

"Don't I know it," CJ muttered.  "Anyway, take it away and hide it," she instructed, passing the envelope to Carol. 

"What's that going to achieve?  Even if we say it must have got lost in the mail, all Donna needs to do is get her mom to send it again." 

"Yeah, but it'll buy me some time to come up with a plan." 

"Okay.  I think you're crazy, but okay," Carol grinned, putting the envelope inside a folder as she left the office. 

* 

The next part of CJ's plan fell into place the following day, as she persuaded Carol to join Donna for lunch in the mess. 

"So, Donna, how's your sister doing?  Is she looking forward to being a bridesmaid?" 

"Yeah," Donna smiled, "she is.  She keeps telling me that it's about damn time." 

"She and your mom have chosen the bridesmaids dresses, I hear?" 

"Yeah...well no, actually, my mom chose them." 

"Oh, yeah, that's right, CJ mentioned that." 

"Has the catalogue my mom sent to CJ not arrived yet?" Donna inquired. 

"Uh, no," Carol said quickly, dipping her head slightly to avoid Donna's gaze. 

"Hmm, that's strange.  She said the company has an Internet site, I'll maybe have a look on that." 

"Uh, yeah, maybe you should," Carol agreed, causing Donna to look at her strangely. 

"Carol, is something wrong?" 

"No," she smiled. 

"Are you sure?  You just...are you *sure* the dress catalogue hasn't arrived?" 

"What makes you ask that?" Carol replied, deflecting Donna's question. 

"I don't know, you just seem...it seems like you're trying to find something out, without actually asking me.  What is it?" 

"You think I'd try something like that with you?" she asked, once again answering a question with a question. 

"I'm surprised you are, given that I live and work with Josh and know how to handle myself, but yeah, that's exactly what you're doing; what's going on?" 

"Nothing, Donna, honestly," Carol assured her.  "I just think that maybe the catalogue got lost in the mail, so looking on the Internet would be a good idea."  Donna stared at her for a moment but didn't say anything.  "Does your sister like the dress your mom chose?" Carol asked, trying to sound completely innocent with her question. 

"Yeah, she said it's really nice, and my mom *loves* it," Donna smiled. 

Carol inwardly groaned at Donna's words, knowing that CJ was going to do a lot of yelling when she imparted the information to her.  She decided it was time to change the subject before Donna asked what was going on again, so they spent the rest of their lunch break discussing Danny trying to get back in CJ's love life. 

* 

"So, Josh, how long is it now until the wedding?" Leo asked as he and Josh finished their meeting. 

"About two months," Josh smiled. 

"You've actually set a date, I hear." 

"Yeah," he confirmed. 

"So, does that mean you have the honeymoon problems sorted out?" 

"Huh?" 

"CJ told me that the date of the wedding depended on the honeymoon arrangements; were there problems with flights or something?" 

"No, not really, I just had a few things to organize, that's all." 

"Where are you going?" Leo inquired as Josh prepared to leave the office. 

"Uh, back to my office," Josh replied, turning back to look at Leo.  "I have another meeting to prepare for." 

"No, I meant where are you going on honeymoon?" 

"I'm not gonna tell you *that*, Leo," Josh grinned. 

"It's okay, Josh, CJ told me anyway." 

"CJ?" he asked with surprise. 

"Yeah, she said you're going to Hawaii." 

"I *am*?  Uh, okay, that's not actually true, but if that's what CJ wants to believe..." 

"It's what Donna told her." 

"Donna?  *Donna* told her that we're going to Hawaii?" 

"Yes, are you saying you're *not* going to Hawaii?" 

"That's exactly what I'm saying." 

"So, where *are* you going?" 

Josh smirked.  "I'm still not gonna tell you that." 

"Was Donna just trying to throw CJ off the scent?" Leo guessed. 

"No, Donna doesn't know where we're going." 

"She doesn't?" Leo questioned with obvious surprise.  "Doesn't she have a say in it?" 

"No, I said I wanted to organize it all and keep it as a surprise for her." 

"And Donna *agreed* to that?" he grinned. 

"Hey!  Yes, she agreed; she thinks it's romantic," Josh smirked. 

"Josh, you have actually *booked* something, right?  You don't want to leave it until the last minute, you know." 

"I know, Leo," he laughed.  "Don't worry, it's all booked." 

"Good, in that case, all I have to do is call all the airlines and get them to check their passenger lists for around the date of your wedding and I'll be able to find out where you're going." 

"Who says we're flying?" Josh smirked. 

"Josh, you're not just gonna drive her to somewhere in New England, are you?" 

"No," he laughed.  "We're flying, but the airlines won't give you any information, they're not allowed to." 

"You do remember who I am, don't you, Josh?" Leo smirked. 

"Yeah, but the airline I'm booked with also knows who *I* am so, they won't tell you anything," he retorted with a huge grin. 

"I kinda outrank you, Josh, and I could easily get the President to call them." 

"But you won't, `cos you won't want to ruin this, you know, possibly give it away and ruin it for Donna, and for me." 

"I will be able to get in contact with you while you're away, if I need to, won't I?" 

"Yeah, you'll be able to get hold of us, in a *dire emergency*, and we'll be able to fly home if we need to," Josh stated.  "I'll give you the flight details as we leave the farm and will contact you again once we get to our destination."  Josh looked at him seriously for a moment and then smirked.  "And, if I find out that in the meantime you've discovered where we're going, it will be easy enough for me to change it." 

"I get your point, Josh." 

"I hope so, `cos I wouldn't want to have to tell my mom that you're planning to sabotage my honeymoon," he threatened with a smile. 

"Go!" 

* 

"Josh, I have to talk to you," CJ said as she entered his office, shut the door and took a seat. 

"What's up?" Josh asked with intrigue. 

"It's about the wedding." 

Josh furrowed his brow.  "*My* wedding?"  CJ nodded.  "What about it?" 

"Well, you know Donna asked me to be a bridesmaid?" 

"Actually, we *both* asked you, CJ," he corrected. 

"Oh, yeah, sorry," CJ smiled sheepishly.  "Anyway, you know Donna's mom is choosing the bridesmaids dresses?" 

"Yeah, since she can't be here to help Donna choose her dress," he smiled. 

"Josh, has Donna *seen* the dress her mom has chosen?" 

He shrugged his shoulders.  "I guess so, but I really don't know.  Why?" 

"It's hideous," she groaned. 

"What?" 

"Josh, there's no *way* I can wear it." 

"CJ," Josh started.  "Wait, hold that thought," he instructed, raising his voice to yell, "Donna!" 

Donna opened the door moments later.  "Josh?" 

"Josh!" CJ exclaimed, her eyes wide and threatening. 

"Donna, CJ has something to tell you," he informed her.  Donna stepped into the office, leaving the door slightly ajar, and looked at CJ. 

"Josh!" CJ gasped. 

"CJ, you should tell her." 

"Tell me what?" Donna asked, beginning to get worried. 

Josh waited for CJ to speak but, when she remained silent, he decided to do it for her.  "CJ doesn't like the dress," he stated. 

"The dress?" 

"You know, the bridesmaid dress your mom chose." 

"You don't like it?" Donna asked, turning wide eyes to CJ.  Silence filled the air as CJ glared at Josh and then turned to meet Donna's eyes; seeing confusion in them, she briefly closed her own eyes, trying to gather strength.  "CJ?" Donna prompted. 

Still CJ remained silent, so Josh helped out again.  "She thinks it's hideous," he said. 

"What?" Donna gasped. 

"Josh!" CJ chided. 

"What?" he questioned innocently.  "It's what you said, isn't it?" 

"Well...yeah," she admitted quietly.  "But, couldn't you have, you know, put it more nicely?"  Josh shrugged his shoulders and gave her a rueful smile. 

"CJ?  You really don't like it?" Donna asked in a small voice. 

CJ stood up and crossed to Donna, stopping in front of her.  Looking at her seriously, she replied, "I'm sorry, Donna.  I...I really tried to like it, I honestly did, but I can't wear it.  There will be photos released to the press and...I'd never live it down.  I'm *so* sorry.  I totally understand if you don't want me to be a bridesmaid now, but -" 

"CJ?" Donna interrupted.  "You *really* don't like it?" she repeated. 

"No." 

"Well, thank God for that," Donna grinned, letting her shoulders heave as Josh laughed heartily. 

"What do you mean?" CJ demanded.  Looking from Donna to Josh and then back again, she questioned, "What the hell is going on?" 

Instead of answering the question, Donna stepped around CJ and walked to Josh's desk.  Stopping beside his chair, she held her hand out in front of him. 

"Pay up." 

"What?" he laughed. 

"You heard me; pay up!" 

"No way," he replied.  "I had two days, I think you'll find I win." 

"I think you'll find you don't," she told him. 

"What the hell are you talking about?" CJ demanded to know. 

Josh grinned widely as he slapped Donna's still outstretched hand away.  "We had a bet about how long it would take you to tell us that you hate the dress," he smirked. 

"You what?!!!!!" 

"Yeah, we bet on how long it would be between you seeing the dress in the catalogue and you telling Donna you didn't like it.  That's why I had to have Donna here for you to tell her in person, rather than have me relate it to her gently," he admitted with a grin. 

"And that's exactly why you don't win, Josh," Donna interjected. 

"Huh?" 

"You said it would be two days, it's more than that." 

"No, it's not.  CJ only saw the catalogue two days ago." 

"Actually, she didn't.  Carol admitted to me this morning that it arrived when we thought it would." 

"Which was when?" he asked. 

"Four days ago." 

"Aha!" Josh exclaimed proudly.  "In that case, you don't win either, Donnatella; you had three days." 

"So, who does win?" CJ asked, not really wanting to hear the answer. 

"I believe that would be me," a voice said from the doorway. 

At the sound of the President's voice, CJ and Donna turned around and Josh jumped up from his chair. 

"Mr *President*?" CJ asked with shock. 

"Yes, CJ, me," he smiled, walking towards Josh and holding his hand out.  "I believe you owe me some money, Mr Lyman." 

"Wait, I..." CJ started, then stopped and looked at the President.  "Sir, would you mind if I?"  She pointed to a chair and he nodded his agreement.  "Thanks," she said, flopping down into the chair.  "I'm trying to get to grips with this," she continued.  "Are you telling me that the hideous dress was part of a prank, and that you were a part of the prank, Sir?" 

"Ah, the penny has dropped," he grinned.  "It was ingenious, wasn't it?" 

"Yes, it was," she grudgingly admitted.  "Whose idea was it, Josh's or Donna's?" 

"You don't think it was mine?" the President asked her with mock-hurt in his tone. 

"No, I don't," she smiled.  "You're devious, Sir, but you're not *that* devious." 

"I should take offence at that," he told her. 

"Except, you know I'm right." 

"Yeah." 

"So, who *was* it?" she asked again, looking directly at Josh. 

"Uhh...well, uh..." he stammered. 

"It was me, CJ," Donna admitted quietly, stepping closer to the President for a bit of protection. 

"You?" 

"Yeah, with a bit of help, of course," she replied, looking at Josh.  He rolled his eyes and let out a sigh. 

"I *knew* you'd drag me into this." 

"Hey, you were the one who persuaded my mom to get involved and send the catalogue down." 

"Well, it wouldn't have worked if the catalogue had passed through your hands first," Josh explained. 

"And you, Sir," CJ addressed the President again.  "Why did *you* get involved?" 

"As punishment," he confessed. 

"Punishment?" 

"Yes, for making them think I wanted a big wedding.  I told Josh that it was all your idea and then, as penance, offered to help him get you back." 

"Well, gee thanks.  That's the last time I use you as a prank partner," she grumbled.  "You sold me out *way* too easily." 

"I'm sorry, CJ, but I know Josh is much better at pranks; I wanted to have some fun." 

"And the bet?" 

"Well, being President doesn't pay all that much; I have to take the money where I can get it," he grinned.  "Anyway, I think we've gotten off the subject here," he stated. 

"Which was?" CJ queried. 

"The fact that Josh owes me money.  Come on, Josh, pay up.  Don't make me bring in the Secret Service." 

"More like an exterminator," Donna chipped in. 

"Excuse me?" he queried. 

"You know, to get rid of all the moths that will escape when Josh opens his wallet." 

"Hey!" Josh objected. 

"I'm sorry, Josh," Donna laughed. 

"Just remember, Donna, I'm not the *only* one who owes him money," he remarked pointedly.  

Donna glared at him and then, turning to the President, said sweetly, "Sir?" 

"That's alright, Donna; put the money towards the headache pills you must need from living *and* working with Josh." 

"Hey!" 

"Pay up, Josh," the President instructed.  Josh made some mutterings but dutifully pulled out his wallet and extracted twenty dollars, handing the bill to the President.  "Thank you," he grinned, pocketing the money.  "Well, I'll see you all later, some of us have a Country to run." 

Once the President had left the office, CJ let out a loud groan.  "I can't *believe* I fell for this!" 

Josh and Donna let out laughs.  "Neither can we," Donna grinned.  "I thought for sure you were gonna guess; I thought you had asked Carol to try and find out if it was a prank." 

"I did, but you played a good game, Donna; she couldn't read you." 

"That's my girl," Josh smiled proudly, reaching for Donna's hand and kissing her briefly. 

"I will get you back, you know, both of you," CJ warned.  Josh shrugged his shoulders and smirked.  "Remember, Josh, I'm in charge of throwing the bridal shower so I can easily organize something for Donna that will make you jealous." 

"Like what?" he asked skeptically. 

"Like a really cute stripper...or three," she smirked.  Josh glared at her.  "Also, I'm pretty sure I can persuade Toby and Sam to get you drunk and tie you to a lamppost naked or something at your bachelor party; it's not as if it's difficult to get you drunk." 

"You *could*, but you won't," he retorted confidently.  "You'd be the one who'd have to explain the photos to the press." 

"Ah, but it would be worth it," she replied, leaving Josh to gape as she smirked again and left the office. 

"She wouldn't?" Josh asked Donna. 

"She would," Donna grinned, as she also left the office. 

"Oh, God!" Josh groaned to himself. 

** 

The End 

Next up...the bachelor party and bridal shower.  Just what *will* CJ arrange? <g>

Sequel: "Parties 'R Us" 


End file.
